Hi Aliens,

It’s been a few weeks since the release of my single “Tell Me”. As you know, I decided to release it early because its message was so important to me and so close to my heart, given the situation we find ourselves in politically, socially and culturally.

I was overwhelmed by the support and love that was shown for this song. Thank you for listening to my message so thoughtfully and for the support you have shown me in my campaign for unity and love. I can see that you all feel the same. Your support helps me to spread this message that I feel so deeply about. I wouldn’t be able to do it without you.

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Hello aliens,

Many of us have been staying home more than ever. Because of this, we've had a lot more time by ourselves. You’ve probably faced some unfamiliar experiences during these times.

Some may be pleasant and some uncomfortable...

• Hearing the birds chirp in the morning for the first time.

• Turning on the TV or blasting the music every waking hour to avoid hearing your own thoughts.

• Enjoying new hobbies you've always wanted to try.

• Finally allowing yourself to relax and do something enjoyable for its own sake.

• Constantly finding ways to kill time.

• Asking yourself, "Why are you trying to kill time in the first place?"

• Experiencing panic attacks for the first time.

• Feeling loneliness for the first time.

• Obsessively organizing every nook and cranny of your home, then re-arranging it all over again.

• Feeling joy and pride in making your own home-cooked food, even if it doesn’t taste that great.

• Slathering ketchup on every meal to make your home cooked food taste better.

• Having an achy lower back from working on the bed or kitchen table.

• Craving and then indulging in chocolate for breakfast.

• Crying uncontrollably.

All your experiences and sensations are important and valid. You are not alone.

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Hi Aliens,

I'll be taking a short break off from blogging for a while to do some recording.

See you soon in the near future.

Be weird, be you.

Amirah

P.S. Need a nice Unity Face Mask?

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NT: No work after 6 pm today. Do something relaxing.

Me: Okay.

(The next day.)

NT: What did you do last night?

Me: I watched personal development videos.

NT: I thought I said relaxing.

Me: It is relaxing.

NT: (slaps forehead)

NT: Stop working and eat this now.

Me: One more minute…

(Three hours later.)

NT: Did you eat it?

Me: One more minute…

#hyperfocus #aspielife #adhd

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Words that immediately make me start planning my escape route:

• Socializing

• Networking

• Wedding

• Large family gatherings

What are yours?

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Me at a restaurant before COVID19:

Me: (to the waiter): Can you bring all my dishes out at once with the check? You don’t need to come by my table anymore. I’ll let you know if I need anything else, deal? And can you turn down the music, too? I’ll leave you a big tip.

Waiter: You sure make my job easy.

#aspielife

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My first Aspergers consultation at the doctor’s office:

Doctor: Would it have bothered you if the water feature in the waiting room had been turned on?

Me: (to myself): How does she know what I’m thinking???

Doctor: Does this tabletop look okay to you?

Me: Well, since you asked… I think the printer should go a little more to the left, the stack of books a couple inches to the right. I’d move the black bowl next to the Buddha statue, and maybe move the candle out in front of them. I’d also rearrange the flowers in the vase and then move it over there. Actually, why don’t I just do it for you since I’m here (starts to stand up).

Doctor: (Clears throat) No thank you, that won’t be necessary. Please sit down. (scribbles notes in her pad)

Me: (Deep sinking feeling of a possible revelation)

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Me at social events:

Me: I need a nap.

NT: Again?

Five minutes later.

NT: (cracks door) You need to come down and talk to people. This is your fifth

nap today. Everyone is starting to look at me funny.

Me: How about if you tell them I need to get to bed early? I am an early to bed,

early to rise person. It’s the truth.

NT: Yeah, but it’s only 6pm. (slaps forehead)

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What routines have you created for yourself to help manage your stress or loneliness?

My routine or protocol is:

• Get to the root of the problem - why do I feel this way?

• Figure out solutions - how do I resolve this?

• Meditate

• Journal

• Execute

• Did this work? Reassess

• Execute again.

• Reassess.

• Execute until the desired result is achieved

• Engage with nature

• Jot down what I am grateful for

• Engage more with nature

• Invest in deep relationships

• Have deep conversations with others or myself

• Eat something delicious

• Hike

• Unplug

• Hike again

• Unplug more

• Do something I want to do for pure enjoyment

• Help others and get out of my thoughts

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NT: What are you doing?

Me: Looking for hiking shoes

NT: But our hike isn’t until next year.

Me: Precisely.

NT: What are you doing?

Me: Packing.

NT: But your trip isn’t until next month.

Me: Precisely.

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What have you been doing to occupy yourself during self-sheltering/lockdown/MCO?

I have been:

• Working

• Organizing myself

• Thinking about my work

• Focusing on my health

• Thinking again about my work

• Working a lot more

• Trying to sleep

• Finally getting to sleep

• Organizing my life

• Thinking about my life

• Going for walks

• Admiring more sunsets

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Aspie problems:

• Doing too much.

• Doing too little.

• Doing nothing when something is expected.

• Doing something when nothing is expected.

#aspielife

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I did not know that journaling was actually a form of stimming.

Sometimes, it is not that I want to write - it is because I want to feel the pen glide on a piece of paper.

I write a lot throughout the day.

Usually, it is my to-do list, my schedule, my ideas…

I also enjoy writing in my productivity journal and my personal journal. I do not do this as consistently as I want to, though. There are days when I am doing it every day. And sometimes I stop for a while.

When I am troubled or confused, I usually start writing in my journal. Simply because I know how effective it is for problem-solving.

Writing in my journal and asking myself the questions I have in my mind helps bring up the answers for me.

Sometimes I am surprised by what comes out. I usually have pretty fruitful “aha” moments, ideas and discoveries.

Sometimes it is a literal pros and cons list. I do that a lot too.

Sometimes it is a list of things I need to think about for example energy management.

There are times when I avoid journaling even though I feel I really need it because I am afraid of what may come up. I do not feel too great about those moments. Just writing that thought down over, makes me realize how silly it sounds.

The truth is always better. The truth always sets me free. Even in the toughest moments.

Journaling is a way for me to be a friend to myself.

It also reminds me to be gentle with myself. That sometimes it is ok to just have time to recover, to feel and to press the pause button.

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How my Aspie brain thinks:

• Is this logical?

• What’s the logic behind this?

• The logical thing to do is…

How my Aspie brain handles problems:

Me: What’s the solution?

NT: Sometimes, people just want to talk and vent.

Me: (Cannot compute)

Why would emotions be part of this?

#aspiebrain

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I was born to love the sunshine.

I miss the sun tremendously when I do not get to see it for more than 24 hours.

The sun is like a long lost friend that I am eager to meet every day.

The sun reminds me that everything will be alright. Good things are always coming my way.

That there is so much that I can be grateful for. Even in the toughest and darkest times.

When I am going through an emotionally painful time, my body naturally remembers to wake up before the sunrise.

Being awake as the sun rises up reminds me that a new beginning awaits for me.

A gift I get to receive every single day. Today I can choose to be happy.

I can never live in a dark cold place. It makes me feel too depressed.

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For an Aspie, pain is:

• When people think you’re lying when you are telling the truth just because you’re not facially expressive or don’t make eye contact.

• When people think you're unemotional and lack empathy because you sound monotone when you speak.

• When people get mad at you because they use subtext and you don’t understand why because they are not communicating directly and literally.

• When people think you’re pretending not to understand them, when you really aren’t.

• When people think you’re lazy or just trying to get attention when you truthfully do not understand something or am asking many questions in order to understand something.

• When you share your honest feelings and people don’t believe you because you’re so matter-of-fact about it.

• When you lose a friend and don’t know why.

• When people take advantage of your honesty and kindness.

• When you do something that’s not required, or don’t do something that is.

#aspielife

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Questions I just don’t understand:

“How are you?”

“What’s happening?”

“How’s it going?”

Too many variables. Cannot compute.

Thoughts that go through my head when somebody asks me one of those questions:

a. Do you mean what’s happening right now?

b. How much do you want to know?

c. Do you really care or are you just being polite?

d. Am I being inauthentic if I say this?

e. Am I being too personal if I say that?

f. Can my answer be on a scale from one to ten?

#aspielife

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Honesty makes decision making so - much - easier.

1. Honesty makes life simple.

2. Honesty makes things less complicated.

3. Honesty avoids unnecessary miscommunication.

4. Honesty helps build truthful, deep connections.

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What would you do if you were worth 189 billion dollars?

That is enough for several thousand generations and lifetimes.

If I was worth 189 billion dollars, would I be happy?

I guess that is beside the point.

The point is, yes I would, if I also can:

• Fulfil my life purpose and calling

• Contribute to the world

• Have the freedom to be my true self.

• A fulfilling spiritual life

• Deep relationships and connections

• Peaceful restful sleep

• Able to live in a calm quiet place surrounded by nature

• A healthy mind and body

• The ability to constantly quench my curiosity

• The ability to constantly learn new things

• Have the freedom of time

• Travel, travel, travel

If I was worth 189 billion dollars, the most important thing that I have the responsibility to do is to make the world a better place to my utmost ability. And travel a lot because I love travelling. Is the one thing I love most in the world other than music.

If I was worth 189 billion dollars, and I could not travel because of COVID19, then all that is left is to focus on making the world a better place. The next thing would be to invest in myself and gain as much knowledge and skill as I can. After all, investing in yourself is the most important investment you can make. I am an extremely curious person. I love learning. I am also a #multipotentialite. Which means, that I love learning lots of new things.

Some of the most important causes I would focus on is climate change, education and poverty. I don’t understand how a country as advanced and wealthy as the USA is filled with so many homeless people on the streets. Does not compute. There is something seriously wrong with this picture.

What would you do if you were worth 189 billion dollars?

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